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I let my boyfriend answer it and eavesdropped from the kitchen. Oh no, not Fishman. Arguably, he had also tried to chat me up. Both of these endeavours had been unsuccessful. His return did not thrill me.
Although we live in a Francophone neighbourhood, Fishman delivered these last lines in a slow and mocking English. He seemed insulted that his presence should be questioned. The woman I guess would be your mother. Can you get her for me please? Now, I am a little older than my fella. Seven years to be exact. Seven and a half to be exacter. We are not Harold and Maude. We are not even Brigitte and Macron. Could anyone realistically mistake me for his mother? But she is also in her 60s, while I am in my 30s.
I think that when Fishman — mids, bearded, baseball-capped — first intruded upon me in the swelter of the summer he saw a woman in his dating bracket. He has, like many men in their 50s, spent his life being deeply misled by the telly, where male le his age and older are paired with pretty, flitty wee fillies in their 20s and younger.
This has skewed his sense of reality. It has skewed all of our senses of reality, to be honest. I was so used to seeing Harrison dripping in women a third of his age that a more demographically realistic romantic interest jarred. This is strange because if you stop looking at screens Are you a older woman looking look out of windows instead you notice that most people tend to date in and around their own age group. Beautiful year-old women usually throw themselves at handsome year-old men, not at dandies they picked up down the bingo. Decades-long age gaps are real and perfectly cool, and age is just aand love is love, and love is all you need etc, but such gaps are also not the norm.
Yet, as a woman in her 30s, I can roundly attest that men in their 50s do not seem to know this. So Fishman gets to my door, and expects to find a woman in his general league. When the door is opened instead by a handsome young man in his 20s, it does not compute. Now, you might be thinking, what has handsome got to do with it? Is she just finding opportunities to boast about her sexy boyfriend? And yes I am, but, nonetheless, I think handsome is part of the equation. Because not only is my boyfriend a little younger than me, which is not the norm, he is also a little hotter than me, which is not de rigueur either.
I know. But then I started to introduce the Frenchman to my friends, or to send the odd photo of us on a city break to my Irish girls WhatsApp group. This gave me pause. Was everyone wearing my I fancy you glasses? It is evident that Fishman could not help but be confused, the poor lamb. I mean, take 20 seconds to think of a celebrity pairing — real or fictional, past or present — where the woman is more beautiful than the man. Harvey Weinstein and Georgina Chapman.
Kirsten Dunst and that guy from Fargo. The romantic le in every single Woody Allen film. Then try it in reverse. Twenty seconds. Whatcha got?
Me neither. I think that very attractive women are more likely to date regular looking blokes than vice versa. Women are less shallow than men, you see. No, no. Not I. On the doorstep, my Frenchman was out of patience. Yes, this is my son, the security. I did not say this. Fishman curled his lips into a snarl.
Then he circled, dived off my stoop, and cut his way through the crisp of the day. My Frenchman, conversely, did not like the story one bit. He thinks Fishman was trying to provoke him by telling him to go get his mother and then asking me if he was the security. What did she think we were?
There are plenty of metaphorical fish in the proverbial sea, but the expected patterns of how they should choose a mate are actually pretty limiting. I wonder how many women would never date a younger man, even if they wanted the same things from life, because of a subconscious awareness of social perception?10 Signs That Older Single Women Are Interested In You
For feminism, you understand. Sat 17 Aug Hopefully my Frenchman would dispatch him. Vous cherchez qui? The woman who lives here. She knows me. Can you get her for me? The cogs of my brain smoked as I struggled to process the category error.
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